So many people talk about clearing blockages but don’t actually show you how. They use all this vague terminology that feels confusing without an actual step-by-step process. Because actual healing is an artful and intuitive skill. You must be self-aware and able to connect to your inner guidance. Otherwise, you are just stuck in thought loops that solve nothing. Because you cannot heal from your mind or through thinking. You heal from feeling, from connecting the dots of why you are feeling a certain way and being open enough to letting yourself feel through where the emotion stemmed from. It’s connecting the emotional breadcrumbs until you reach the core, the root of the problem or emotional trigger. Logical thinking will not get you there.
But how do you stop the thinking and get into the feeling? Well, you must first “turn off” the thinking brainwave (beta brainwave) and go to the meditative brainwave (theta). Don’t panic; this is a very easy and quick thing to do.
This is how: You sit in silence, close your eyes, and take three deep breaths. Once you feel your mind is calm, begin doing one of two things: tapping or writing. I typically do both.
Tapping helps to release energy blockages and calm the nervous system, while writing allows you to externalize your thoughts and emotions, creating space for deeper self-awareness and clarity.
I’m going to give you an example so you can actually see how it’s done.
I have a recurring trigger that keeps coming up, that feels like literally every person I come into contact with is showing me this same trigger.
Please keep in mind that most people triggering you is not intentional, so try not to take it personally.
The trigger is “I am not good enough and don’t know enough to start my own business.”
How are people showing me this or triggering this negative belief? It can be in the most subtle ways.
Remember, no one can make you feel anything that you don’t already feel and believe to be true.
Maybe someone’s offhand comment makes you feel insecure, or a lack of response to your message triggers feelings of rejection. Perhaps a particular tone of voice evokes memories of a critical parent, or a certain facial expression brings up feelings of unworthiness.
Here’s an example: You are talking with a friend, and you’re telling her about your business idea. She’s present and very engaged in listening to you. She is not saying much; maybe she is more actively listening to you, wanting to hear every detail, and her silence triggers a thought of “she thinks I’m not good enough and doesn’t know how to tell me” or “she thinks my idea is not good,” etc.
There are hundreds of thoughts that can be triggered from the most minute facial expressions of others, lack of comments, or a word they said or even the tone in their voice. It is all merely a reflection of what you are already feeling and thinking about yourself.
It does not mean they feel that way or are thinking anything negative about you.
In this situation, the only thing you need to do and be aware of are your thoughts, feelings, and emotions.
When you see or feel a negative thought come up, take a mental note or even jot it down in your phone; you will need this for later.
Do not just repress it and go on about your day, if you want to truly heal, that is.
This note can be as simple as, “Was talking to Sarah about my business and felt sadness, anxiety, and shame come up.”
Once you are back home, you are going to journal about your experience with Sarah. You are going to write it out as if you are telling someone about it.
But first, you are going to ground yourself with three deep breaths, closing your eyes for five minutes to calm your mind and connect with your inner guidance.
Why do we do this? So that you get out of a thinking, hectic mental state and sink down into your body so that you can feel what comes up during your writing.
Let’s move forward.
You can start with, “Today, I was talking with Sarah, and I felt she didn’t like my business idea, and I felt stupid, unworthy, and useless.” (I know it can seem harsh, but the more brutally honest you are with yourself, the better!)
Now is not the time to lift yourself up or think positive. We are “cleaning out your house” and want to make sure we get all the dust and bugs out of there before we begin to decorate with uplifting, beautiful words.
Don’t just describe the situation; delve into the emotions it brought up. What specific memories or past experiences did it connect to? Where do you feel these emotions in your body? (If you did not feel it in your body, that’s ok. I used to not feel anything at all).
Allow yourself to fully experience and express these feelings without judgment.
Remember, this is not about Sarah, the way she looked at you, what she said, and how she said it. It is 100% about YOU and how those completely unintentional actions from Sarah triggered you.
Side story: I have “received messages” from total strangers walking by where we look at each other as we cross paths, and from that one millisecond of a glance from a total stranger, I picked up, “They think I’m weird; they wouldn’t want to be my friend.” This example goes to show just how illogical and unintentional these messages are and that they are literally just trying to get your attention so that you can HEAL IT.
Pay attention to your THOUGHTS and then the emotions (sadness, unworthiness, not good enough) that follow the thought.
We are literally being shown all day long what our triggers are. It is up to us to take action or not.
The action you take is jotting down these triggers that come up so that you can do the work when you are alone in a safe and comfortable space.
As you write, pay attention to the emotions and memories from the past starting to surface, and feel them.
How do you do this? Keep writing. If you’re feeling triggered now and emotional, that’s good, keep writing, and keep feeling.
Stay with the memories or words that have the most emotional charge to them until you feel that charge lessen.
It should feel like a build-up of emotions and then a release after a certain time.
This can be 10 minutes or an hour. It all depends on how deep this trigger goes. If it’s from your childhood and something that’s never been acknowledged until now, it may take some time to uncover all the layers.
You might experience a sense of relief, a shift in perspective, or a deeper understanding of yourself and your triggers.
The release might come with tears, laughter, or a sense of profound peace.
I go deeper into detail in my Becoming Your Own Healer Course. This course is for beginners who are just getting started and need more guidance. I give you real-life examples of how to release blockages and trapped emotions in the body.
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